Married but Separated

Married is married. It doesn't matter if the individual is separated and the divorce papers are filed. Once the bond of a marriage is broken, there are emotional and spiritual edges that are jagged. Both individuals need space and time to heal and catch their breath. If you meet someone that's a wonderful person and you think they would be a great mate in your future, keep in touch periodically. Do not engage in the acts of dating or getting intimate. Why? Whether they live together or not, there are spiritual (unseen) laws that are still in effect.

Understand that at the day they stood at the alter and took the oath of forever, their spirits became one. Until, the law of the land (divorce) has been final, the spiritual law remains in effect. Not to even mention the emotional attachments that are unseen, the good and the bad. Just imagine adding your soul into their mix. That's an ugly pot of soup there! 

In the event that you meet someone that is married, even if they are separated, do yourself a favor and tell them what you would want someone to tell your mate. I would say to the married individual, when you are single we can interact. I would advise them to be sure they have done all that they can do to reconcile. Give it their all so that way, if or when they leave....their hands are clean. As for you, don't get caught in adulterous affairs. You do not want to be the straw that broke the camel's back in any marriage......way too costly for your soul.

Stay alert....everyone is tested some day.

Dating a Married Person

I am aware that relationships are challenges and marriages are more than a full time job. Even when you are at work, you can't help but to consider the issues at home. I understand that people who have been married for many years have evolved and are no longer the same person as the day they got married. I get it. Unfortunately, who you wanted or needed at 20 years old will not be the same as what you need or want at 50. So, what do you do? The only thing I can suggest is "to thine self, be true".

What I don't understand, is the rationalization of many people when they encounter a married individual. So, you meet an individual that says they are married but they have problems at home. They mention it so casually as if the problem isn't them at all. So now, they expect to be in the running amongst other single people. Part time relationships but full time emotion....puh-leeeeze! When you entertain this option, the married person's misery becomes your obligation now. Is that okay for you? You don't mind carrying their mate's torch? The phrase "I am married but..." is a trap for individuals who do not have a good sense of who they are. We all deal with esteem issues from time to time. However, if you are entertaining being someone's last priority, you have a low opinion of your worth. I would even dare to say, you have an identity crisis.

Be encouraged that you can have a mate that cares and nurtures you. You don't have to share mate. Besides, the spiritual price that you will pay just isn't worth it. It's better to remain single and keep living.